HEaRtbUrN

Inside of me inside of me inside of me, my chest there is a pain a ball of pain knotting its way clogging up my arteries choking me into believing that today my world is going to end. my shoulders hold my heavy thoughts and hunch me over increasing the anxiety in between my chest and my belly. the witch stares at me through her blind eyes her veil is black and therefore when she sees me, Black is all that she sees. bitch. this makes my discomfort worse. how else could i focus on getting rid of the claustrophobia rising within. i should've followed my dreams to become a dancer. that way when i move I could send out my expressions through that medium instead of sitting still my fingers pounding away at this keyboard when all i want to do is dance as this music sings to me and only me. so maybe my passion isn't writing but dancing but being that i gave up dancing over twelve years ago i have taken on a second lover. Lover. he's gone on to love another. fucking monkey. his brother called it a love, hate relationship. I don't know if that's right or on point but i guess in the world of whatever society deems "normal" love, hate, it is. one woman tells me to sing, "i am titanium," p!nk tells me to "try" and all I want is my silence back. where sanity dwells and i am calm i am calm i am calm punctuations never work for me so get over it guilty conscience speaks through even when there are no questions asked. i am not okay.