S.i.S.syyyyy

Suffering in Silence listening to music. A choice made with a twisting emotion destined to regurgitate what one may think is right and settle for what is wrong because the pleasure of wrong is instant gratification. Sitting its Struggles within me learning to bare with it as opposed to just getting rid of it or ignoring it. Smiling is Slyly deceiving because when you smile no one suspects pain. Pain is seen as weakness and I have no time for it to be a public announcement. Life right now is gladly only a choice between single and looking versus involved and dissatisfied. But that weak heffa inside of me sings every Gawd-damned night "Anytime you need a lover call on me..." Surely it Shows whenever I am caught off guard but I don't care. Eventually suffering will be forgotten, I'll be sitting in peace once more similar to how I felt when I met you, and my smile will be a constant flirtation with Life. And the song, the song will simply belong to someone else.

My Thoughts on "HappyThankYouMorePlease"

The worse movie EVER created!!!! Ok. No seriously. That was the best movie I have ever come across in a long time. Yes it's a chic flick. Yes even the sad moments were happy. Every single frame, every single scene made me all ooey gooey mushy inside and it brought hope back into my life. Yes...a movie brought hope back into my life. Hope about what??? A hope that "quirkiness" is acceptable and that it's ok to be happy w/o wondering if the Universe is going to pay you back with Negativity as a balance to the Positive things in life.

First off, my good friend who suggested this movie to me and who shall remain nameless, should have told me that "Johnny #2" was the protagonist of this movie. Josh Radnor, prob most famously known from the TV sitcom "How I Met Your Mother," looks like my Johnny Depp. Same cheek bones, same nose....  and man, oh man, do I love the dark hair, scruffy face look. Yummmm... Lol. And the little boy?! Man! Dude! I wanted to adopt him. Talk about A.D.O.R.A.B.L.E. LOL)

Second, the term "Thank you, more please".... I think this I will adopt into my life. Continue to be grateful for life itself and enjoy it, even when sad and scary moments happen. This couldn't be more "Ghandi-ish" if I thought about it less. Ghandi said, "We must be the change we want to see in this world," and it is really something to consider.  I would like to see more love in this world. Coming from a Christian point-of-view I tell my two best friends (M&D) that we must be Love because God is Love and if he made us in his own image then, logically, we must be Love. And uhhh...in case you didn't pick up on it, M&D stands for Mom & Dad. And thanking God, or the Universe, for this Love and asking for "more, please?" opens us spiritually to continue to accept the positive things in this life. That doesn't mean that the intimidating events would never come but definitely helps to bring a smile on especially when there is no serious reason to frown.

Third, watch the movie. If you're tired of being angry just to be angry, or down, just to be down and you need a pick-me-up...watch the movie.

Thanks Good Friend. More please?


ALG

OK...So call me a Contradiction

IDC.... LMAO. I don't mind being a walking contradiction. It means that I am not set in my own thoughts. I have no qualms questioning my own beliefs. I don't mind being my own quagmire. Everything I do/ say has a purpose/justification. I spoke in the last blog about "Make It Zen" being a contradiction and yet in its own right, the title is justified. I am open to most thoughts and open to hearing most of other's p.o.v.(s) but at the end of the day, I still hold to what I want to hold to. Even if you just spoke for an hour or two. That's not time wasted. I get to hear you and try to understand where you are coming from. Doesn't mean I'm going to change my mind on what I think. Or maybe I would but just not right away. >shrug< who knows?? But all I can say is at the end of the day, contradicting or not, I can honestly say I try to be a better person. i do try. I just don't beat myself up for it. Many people get lost in their own practices of being "right" or their modality of thinking. Nothing is wrong with that. Studying Zen books...well...reading Zen books help me to understand that bringing peace to ones self isn't about change but acknowledgement. And it has nothing to do with how your "neighbour" views you. It's all about realizing who you are as a person and noticing your own patterns and the paths that you choose. Not every path I've chosen was or will be correct but I will continue choosing as I see fit. So call me a Contradiction just don't shorten the word to "Cont" (Pronounced "Cunt")....at least not to my face...that's just mean. :D

Keep on smiling and Make IT Zen. ALG.

Writing isn't easy

I just need one weekend to myself...not this weekend. This one belonged to my family and so far i'm loving it. buuuuut.... maybe a day of next weekend i'll stay in and just write. complete "Explicitly Yours..." and get to publishing. i'm excited about the book. and i want to put that excitement into it so every reader could feel it and as vibes usually go they will feel excited too.

on another note.... Make IT Zen is such a contradiction. The title that is... b/c you can't force anything within the Zen world. It just has to come naturally. I should have it as "Be It Zen" or "It's Zen" But life is what you make it and that's what brought that title "make it zen" about. So i guess it's fine :)